Diabetes Vernacular

Well, I've been somewhat absent from posting this week, largely because its a short week for me with the Independence Day holiday (or Good Riddance Day, as they refer to it in the U.K.) and I had some things to deal with before I finished my week (I'm fortunate to have Weds., Thurs. and Friday plus Saturday and Sunday off this week).

As some of you know, I've been an active member of the DiabetesTalkFest community for some time, and one of the recent threads was particularly amusing (to me, anyway), and it pertained to Diabetes Vernacular, which are names for everyday diabeters-related issues. I should note that this is a compilation of input from a number of DTF members, most notably a member who himself has type 1, as well as his wife who is fellow diabetes blogger based in Virginia and goes by the the screen name of "Diabetchik". She is not yet a member of the Diabetes OC, but thought that some of my readers might enjoy these, and quite possibly have a few of their own to add to the list. Consider this an invitation or start of a chain letter-type offer to everyone out there to contribute their own terms to the diabetes vernacular.

Here are a few I've pulled from the list:

- Gusher -- after pulling needle or cannula out, blood spurts out
- Red Gold -- after pulling needle or cannula out, blood comes out but not in spurts
- Flicked -- son kicking or pulling wife's insertion site out
- Cheetah Spots -- black and blue belly marks
- Flea Bites -- little red insertion site makrs
- Pencil Pricking -- my wife changes her lancets like once a quarter, her lancets are about as sharp as new pencils
- Surf Boards -- used OneTouch test strip on the carpet
- Cat Toy -- pen needle caps
- Punching Bag -- the tunnel vision you get when really low
- Inhaled Airborne Sugar -- odd overnight spike in BS for no reason
- Salad for dinner? -- "your pre-dinner BS was so high that you have to eat salad as your entree?"
- The Bulge -- meter in pocket
- The Stash -- an odd collection of Easter, Halloween, gifts and other items that contain sugar that are used for lows
- Purgatory -- the time after taking your blood is taken and your doc calls back with the result

The following were my own additions to this brilliant list:

- Multiple choice test -- when you don't even need to use a lancet to test because you can simply squeeze your fingertip and have blood come out of several different lancings already there
- Fingertip skidmarks -- a small streak of blood that continues to leak out of your fingertip after testing which continues leaking no matter how much pressure you put on it
- Bloodletting -- Not using a perfectly good cut from a knife or other household item for a glucose test because you recently tested

Then, there were a few other additions from the Diabetes OC members:

- Leech -- first strip didn't suck up enough blood so it's trash-bound
- Hockey Puck -- glucose tabs
- Very Pregnant -- high positive result on keto strip
- Not Pregnant -- negative result on keto strip
- Rebleed -- leech (see above) didn't work, hole filled in, more pressure needed to get anything out without having to relancet
- Zombied -- fingers too cold to get any blood out
- Drunk -- really-high sugar
- Carb -- any substance up to 15 grams carb in it (potatoes, chips, 6 oz. Catalina dressing, carrots, etc)
- Devil Food -- food that for no reason at all, always shoots your sugar through the roof (why I can't eat popcorn and my wife doesn't eat lots of pizza)
- Fatted -- Pizza style effect where the fat absorbed more slowly so high BS occurs hours later -- yes, I know I should get a pump and embrace the fabled "square bolus."
- High GPA -- Above 7.0 on A1C
- Sugar Stack -- my large collection of glucometers trapped in my closet
- Cheap Date -- all diabetics, we don't require dessert
- UnCarbed -- eating odd food, for which you don't know the carbs for
- Carb Query -- asking wait staff what carb is for UnCarb food -- usually replies come with blank stare
- "You've been pumped!" -- introducing yourself to a total stranger simply by noticing that they're wearing a pump or carrying insulin supplies.
- "High Military" -- food that has high GI value
- Diablandic -- sugar-free or diabetes marketed food that tastes horribly bland (ex: - Girl Scout Sugar-Free Brownies)
- Sugar Shy -- not telling anyone that you're diabetic

I'd love to get some additions to this list from fellow Diabetes OC members, so please give us your postings entitled "Diabetes Vernacular" and add to the list. In the interim, I wish everyone a happy holiday and looking forward to your contributions to this list!